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Sunday, 22 July 2007

while at work....

Yesterday, I was at work doing my normal saturday 8hr shift and believe me, I thought the day was never going to end. It was so damn busy and I was on red light all day long. The least number of calls I had waiting on my "aspect" was 23, just imagine!!!!! dem won kill me ( are they trying to kill me)??? anyways, whenever I was not feeling it I just sat there and stared at the red light or went on the internet and chatted with my loved ones. abi wetin man pikin go do now ( wot would the son of man do)? But out of everybody I sorted out yesterday, I remember this one guy very vividly.

It was a Nigerian man who called, a Nigerian igbo man to be precise. surname was Opara. noramlly I hardly get Nigerian calls I guess thats why when I get calls like dat, I am kind of excited (dont ask me why, cos I dont av an answer). except for one woman like that ohh some mrs Akinyemi woman..... imagine ohh this woman must have called and asked to set up insurance policy in the most yorubaish accent ever. that didnt even budge me. what bothered me the most was her rudeness.

Some Nigerian older people should learn to be respectful honestly... na so mrs Akinyemi do ohhh, land 4 my red book. (here's how mrs Akinyemi wind up in my red book)

mrs A: ehh I want toe set up an insurance policy foh my car

Lighty: would it be in your name?

mrs A: yes nau it is my car

Lighty: can I have your surname please?

mrs A: look it is a toyota corolla nineteen ninety sebin ( I spelt it out so u lot can get what I mean when I say she heard some strong accent) I dont have that much time can you please tell me how much it is.

at this point I knew it would be better if I didnt let her know I am nigerian, I thot am better off being professional and not friendly.

Lighty: madam I cannot give you a quote without entering ur details, it is through ur details that your premium is generated.

this woman no gree mi ohhhh (this woman wasnt having it)

mrs A: errr wo I dont av time to be answering all ur questions can you jos give mi the prise and let mi set it up.

Lighty: madam if it is a quick quote you want, you can go on our website www... and get one, if you have any problems give us a call back and we'll talk you through it.

mrs A: why suld I go onlye (online)? but I am speaking to u now why cant u jos tell mi the prise (lol! as in price)

abi woman yi ti mad ni??? (is this woman crazy?) abasi nbong nsun ton npo ( please lord, what is this)

Lighty: ok wotz ur surname please?

mrs A: ayy I have told you before it is jos a toyota corolla nineteen ninety sebin why cant you jos tell me the prise? why is so difficult 4 u to hear wot am sayin jos give mi the prise I dont av all day.

now mo mu 'pe woman yi ti mad ( now i know this woman is crazy). I swear, sometimes some of us Nigerians can be extremely difficult.

Lighty: I have to take your details mam

mrs A: then u wuld av to call me back, take this numba down

Lighty: what is the number?
am not one to be disrespectful to customers some of my collegues just tell rude customers off in a professional way and I that sometimes, but because I know my people, I could not be bothered to do that, its just long tellin her off.

mrs A: the numba is 020.... call me back now now. I dont have all day, I have things to do.

Lighty: I will call you

mrs A: ok, I will be waiting, call me now now ohh.

Lighty: alright then ill call u now. thanks for your call goodbye.


ha ha ha ha story....... I was thinkin.....just imagine how rude and you expect mi to call u back? when am the one tryin to help you out here. mrs joneeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeesssssie, about callin u back, errr.... no can do. sorry mate!!!! lol! nywayz the last thing I was goin to do that day was call mrs A back. I will rather take off my underwear, stand on my desk and dance with it on my head.


By the way where was I? ok mr Opara. so I tell mr O am nigerian and boiiii was he pleased? in his igbo accent too. am like r u igbo. he's like yeah how did u know? am like ur name ( not. more like I can tell from the accent). he's like what did you say you name was again so I tell him; Lighty. where r u from ( thing about my name is, its one of them names that you can never guess where it's from unless I tell u. its classic and very unique, most pple actually think its a nickname).

Anyway it turned out mr O lives not to far from where i live and he is like haaa after this we shuld hook up. I laugh it off. and because we keep full details of our customers, you have to register their fone numbers too, so i ask for mr O's fone number boiiii!!! was he happy, am like sir it is for company use. he's like save that number. read it to me again so I know you got the right digits. At this stage I decide to be strictly professional with mr O and coninued with my job, yadi yadi yadi. annual premium was told and mr O's voice went from high key to flat note. to be honest it was quite expensive am not gonna lie. and mr O was not happy too.

but somehow he managed to say well since ure my pipu and yav been very hepfu I guess ill just have to take it. my credit card no is ........... and err please call mi ehh wen u finish from work ayy, so we can hook up. ( ay ay ay as if. lol!)

am lyk thanks for your call enjoy ur day.......... I hung up the fone and laughed my head off. so there u go, something to lighten up my busy day.... ahhhhh honestly work gives me jokes sometimes.

diaryyyy I honestly love my job.

6 finger tappings:

Anonymous said...

some rather madd diary...more too come pls...so i can lauugh my yansh out...lol...peace...

Anonymous said...

wow...!!!! ur some funny chic....dont fail to publish more of ur diaries oooo..!!!

Anonymous said...

some crazy shit... funny as hell, laughed all d way through.... we want more of this.

Baroque said...

when next you're in naija, you'll know the true meaning of impolite & disrespectful
...write more

100%Lighty said...

LOL!@ BAROQUE. AND YEP! I WILL MOS DEF WRITE MORE.

Minky said...

LOl...gosh Nigerians mehn they never fail to amuse me!

Ive got exams coming up real soon & im pullin an all nighter...im newish here in blogsville just found your blog today and I couldnt help going through the whole thing.Instead of me to be reading o! hmmm! lol

I will defo be back.