MY Addiction

Sunday, 29 July 2007


Have you ever been pinned to a corner and feel the walls are closing on you? Or been in a relationship that feels like you are bonded by a chain with a lock on it as if a slave? Trust me, it is more freaky than scary.

About being trapped, let me get down to that. I had been with my ex for like 6months and in that 6months, my life was snatched away from me. Let’s call him X. My life was snatched away because by six months, X had let his mum know about me, literarily forced me to tell my mum about him, I was twenty. Ode me, I thought I was living the life because I believed it was love (actually i think i had a stupidity wool over my eyes, bless my lil' heart lol).

Anyway, X lives approximately one hour away from where I work but I had no problems seeing him as frequently as I wanted (or should I say ‘as we both agreed’?). So when X told me that his mum was coming over to see 'us' because she lives where I party, I had no troubles making that happen.

Well I got to X’s house a day before his mum was due to arrive and it was a nerve wrecking 24hr wait (ladies can feel me on this, when it comes to meeting your guy‘s mum for the first time it is bloody scary). X’s mum’s anticipated arrival finally came, and guess what? She came with his grandmother, haaa! His grandmother!!!!!!! from Nigeria? I thought to myself OMG this is crazy. I mean I knew she was around but I didn’t know she was going to travel such long distance as the grandson had just visited her the weekend before why would she come all the way?

I found out why shortly, after I was introduced as X’s wife by Mama X. Omo. I wanted to pass out, I was thinking sh*t if my mother should hear all these, she’ll break my head and ask me who gave my hand in marriage? Well the two women ate and after they were settled, Grandma X decided to make a calling. She beckoned on X and I, you will never guess what happened.

Cool down let me brief you. Grandma X told X and I to kneel down she wants to say a prayer for us. Darlings, this is where my entrapment comes in. I wanted to run away but I couldn’t, it was not possible. I wanted to scream my mother’s name and call for her to save me but that was not even an option. I was so freaked out that I don’t know if anyone noticed how unsettled I was. Umm… Well I managed to fall on my knees and the prayers started.

Grandma X: may you two love one another till the end, may you have as many kids as you want, may anything that tries to separate you be put in asunder yadi! yadi!! yada!!! As she was praying it, I was bouncing them off with the prayers in my head because it felt more like an oath taking session than a prayer to me. what??????? This is six months mate! What’s up with all these?

Anyway the ordeal ended and I was grateful for that until after 24hrs when it was time for mama X and grandma X to leave. This bit is the freakiest bit ever, and it still freaks me out when I remember it. Grandma X decided that she would not leave until she takes a photograph of X and I. There was no camera anywhere in the house and boi!!!!! Was that the happiest one minute of my life? (Not). Grandma X sat down and said she was not going anywhere until she takes a photo with her. Wahala oooo. I on the other hand was seriously praying that a camera would not turn up, camera for what nowww? Peoples, a camera turned up sha to my disappointment and ask me how?
Because she was so strong on her decision X’s younger brother had to go to the shops to get a disposable one and that was how Grandma X sat in-between X and I and younger X took the photograph, Grandma X was happy, she slipped the camera into her bag and they said their goodbyes. I was dazed thinking; what was all of that about?

Well sometimes you will find yourself believing in superstitions, menh! I prayed every night about that freaky encounter, every night. And I am glad to let you know that I have been out that relationship for exactly a year today. I just thought I’ll share a little bit of it with you, and when I think back on it, it scares the hell out of me.

Do you think I am overly thinking it? Could it be that it really meant nothing and maybe Grandma X was just expressing her joy?

5 finger tappings:

Number4 said...

It doesn't sound like it was funny to you then but HA HA HA. I have been laughing so hard. Hilarious. When you went to do 'introduction' ceremony with only his family, you did not know eh!. lol lol.

I could have sworn that relationship was more than six months. I thought I was going to be buying aso-ebi based on all those times we'd chat. Well such is life. We live and we move on. Past relationships are all just practice for the real thing (when we find the real one). Some find them quicker than others (in Practice 1).

And as for grandma X, she was just too happy to meet her future in-law. No harm in that. She wasn't going to put the picture in a calabash or something like that. Lol lol lol

100%Lighty said...

lol! it lasted more than six months. it actually lasted one year and i think 3 or 4 months but at that time it was six. plus you are laffing coz u werent the one kneeling on that floor. i am sure if it were you, you wouldnt find it funny. anywyayz its all laffs now sha! lol!

~Mimi~ said...

i bet i left a comment on this thing!!!!!!

have u been deleting my comments??????????? LIGHTY! LIGHTY!

anyway i will type again oh. warn yaself!

what are you doing?
i am doing my assignment.
????????At 2am??????????

X ohhhhhhhh. lawlinggggg

Favoured Girl said...

That must have been scary for you but I had to laugh! LOL! Welcome to blogville!

100%Lighty said...